I’m Disabled
Hi, I'm Michael, and I'm a stroke survivor.
The term "disability" carries various connotations. Some people embrace it, some reject it, and others prefer not to be defined by it. All these responses are valid, and the choice ultimately rests with the individual.
Hidden struggles - unseen disabilities
I never pondered over it until I met a well-known doctor acquaintance who told me, "You're like me now. Disabled, but no one can see it." He had experienced a life-altering accident years ago, which left him in a coma. He had to painstakingly relearn how to walk and talk, and while he appeared normal to me, he shared that even after a decade, remnants of his accident lingered. Minor things. Annoying little things. Not significant enough to impede his ability to work, but enough to require awareness.
That was a light bulb moment for me (one of several that day, but I'll delve into those details another time).
Finding identity after stroke - navigating a new self
I discussed this revelation with my rehab therapist, and we delved into the term itself. Some individuals are not keen on using it. Even if it reflects their reality, they dislike the label and the way it affects people's perceptions. This was driven home when I was reading a report on how to support children who have had a stroke. Apart from the many common challenges resulting from a stroke, one of the major struggles for children is the formation of their identity. They haven't fully developed one yet.
On the other hand, I had a stroke at 46, and those around me already know me. They recognise my voice, my physical abilities, my personality, and more. Despite the profound changes I have undergone, my family, friends and business network all "know me." Consequently, imposing the label of "disabled" on a child who is already grappling with the myriad consequences of a stroke can be overwhelming.
Owning my journey - embracing my disability
Considering the title of this website, obviously, I came to terms with the label and what it means to me. Yes, I am disabled. I face definable challenges with speech and right-hand control, but so what? I am healthy, my marriage is strong, I can communicate reasonably well, I can drive, I can savour a glass of wine, I can travel, my brain functions well, and numerous other positives grace my life. Moreover, I am blessed with a supportive network of friends who know both the pre-stroke and post-stroke versions of me and cherish both equally. In that regard, I am truly blessed.
Therefore, I choose to embrace the label without fear. Just like the inspiring and occasionally downright audacious endeavours I've pursued throughout my life, the stroke and its impact have now become integral parts of the patchwork quilt that defines who I am. And I proudly own that.
